happy weekend

it was so good seeing my friend A this weekend. he looks soo good and it's been a long time since we've hung out. living 5 hours away sure does suck. can't wait for the end of the year when things are going to get better and we're all gonna be together.
so i did something pretty bad this weekend and even though i know it was wrong...i don't feel anything. i mean as a person who knows the difference between right and wrong, i know what i did was awful and should feel guilty about it every day. but i feel nothing...and that kind of scares me. and i'm not sure if it's because i have so many emotions as well as my heart involved that is clouding my judgment. sigh...sooo confusing. and the timing is so crazy too. i just wish that i could rewind time, change a few things and see how happy i would be now. to think that my life could be so different with the "if only's."

2007!

wow, 2007. where did 2006 go? it was a good year. i started a job that even though i say i hate has been good for me - i got to meet some amazing people who i can now call my best friends. and they've helped me really find myself, to be confident with who i am, ones who accept me for me. and i think that is the best gift a friend can give to another. so it's the beginning of a new year. and i am hoping that it will be one full of surprises and fulfillment of dreams. i'm hoping to finish my master's and moving to the city at the end of the summer. then maybe moving some where bigger and better - who knows! i guess the best part of being single is the fact i don't have to answer to anyone...just can do anything that i want without have to ask permission or having a huge debate about. i can just pack up tomorrow and leave if i wanted to i guess. but saying good-bye sucks, it hurts. anyways. life....